Twilight

I fought it...for a long time...but I read the book 'Twilight'. I know, I know...I caved. Sadly it only took me about 2 days to read...yeah, I actually enjoyed it. But also, since I have a sick aversion as of late to guys who like mind games, I realized that the lead female character was very much getting mind-fucked. Albeit she was only 17 so let me say this-at 17 you generally don't know what you're doing! For example, at 17 I met my daughter's father. Enough said. Ok, I'm kidding. I thought I was in love with him until I was 21-thought I couldn't breathe if he didn't give me affirmation that he was with me (which, most times, only included coming home at night). After a while of not being in the relationship or meeting someone who actually treated me decently, I realized that I deserve more. Another example-I didn't have my first orgasm til I was probably about 24 years old because I found someone who cared about what I needed and wanted. Small things matter.

Back from my tangent after that moment of TMI...Bella (the name of the lead female character in the book and the same name as a very cool dog I know) falls in love with a vampire (Edward) just 2 days after hanging out with him. Hmmm...now I know I've said this to people before but-really? Maybe I'm not the one to be judging because it takes a lot for me to fall for someone (maybe I just haven't met the right vampire lately).

The story goes on with its plot but the general idea I got was that Bella didn't care about her own life after meeting Edward and was only concerned about the safety and well-being of her vampire boyfriend (who, btw, would be very hard to actually harm). She also decides at some point that she 'can't live without him' and both would take their own lives if something happened to the other. He also has A LOT of control over her, watches her from the shadows constantly and even while she sleeps. He confuses the hell out of her by saying things like 'you shouldn't love me, I'm dangerous' then automatically switching to 'you are my life now. you are exactly my brand of heroin'. Wow. All I can say is - would you really want your daughters thinking that this is acceptable?

But-I did like the book enough and plan on seeing the movie but not because of the hype around it. Because I love a good vampire flick and the idea of 'good vampires' intrigues me.

An excerpt that genuinely portrays some of what annoyed me:

"And for all that," he continued, "I'd have fared better if I had exposed us all at that first moment, than if now, here--with no witnesses and nothing to stop me--I were to hurt you."

I was human enough to have to ask. "Why?"

"Isabella." He pronounced my full name carefully, then playfully ruffled my hair with his free hand. A shock ran through my body at his casual touch. "Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me." He looked down, ashamed again. "The thought of you, still, white, cold . . . to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses . . . it would be unendurable." He lifted his glorious agonized eyes to mine. "You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever."

My head was spinning at the rapid change in direction our conversation had taken. From the cheerful topic of my impending demise, we were suddenly declaring ourselves. He waited, and even though I looked down to study our hands between us, I knew his golden eyes were on me.

"You already know how I feel, of course," I finally said, "I'm here . . . which, roughly translated, means I would rather die than stay away from you." I frowned. "I'm an idiot."

"You are an idiot," he agreed with a laugh. Our eyes met, and I laughed, too. We laughed together at the idiocy and sheer impossibility of such a moment.

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb . . ." he murmured. I looked away, hiding my eyes as I thrilled to the word.

"What a stupid lamb," I sighed.

"What a sick masochistic lion."

--Twilight, Chapter 13, "Confessions", pages 273-274



To sum up-it is NEVER ok to let someone control so much of your life that you would forget your own personal well-being. Of course, parenting is excluded-obviously I would do anything and everything to make sure my daughter was safe, even at the risk of losing myself.

Let's get one thing straight though-I don't actually believe in vampires and, unless you can really prove the existence of such, I'll go along thinking that they are fictional characters of books and great movies.

I've started reading the second book in the series now, I'll let you know if it's any less absurd.